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Larry Norman -> Larry Norman -> Randy Stonehill Site Comment...
Post Info TOPIC: Randy Stonehill Site Comment...
Terry Roland

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Randy Stonehill Site Comment...
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I read Randy Stonehill's comments on his site yesterday. First, let me say, I feel somewhat angry about the tone of the letter.  I believe it was maybe a personal and private letter of regret about opportunities missed. I also wonder about his comment that he knew Larry better than anyone.  I wonder what Charles would have to say about that...Or his mother?  I also wonder about those who sustained healthy relationships with Larry to the end. When there is conflict, it is rarely one-sided, but the tone of Stonehill's letter sounds like the disconnect came from Larry alone.   

All of that aside, a tribute from Randy Stonehill about Larry would've been more fitting at this time.  Whatever personal feelings he may have held could be put aside for now, or relayed in a more personal manner. 

It was just disappointing.  And then to not show up at the memorial.....

I hope I don't sound judgemental.....it just bothered me..struck me as poor timing and inappropriate. 

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Anonymous

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Afraid you ARE sounding a bit judgemental ol' Terry.

And as to inappropriate... well...  maybe you had a bad day.

God bless,

The Anonymous Exhorter 


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Tony

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Get over it!

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Anonymous

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"Hurting People Hurt People"?
 
My take is Randy didn't mean any disrespect at all, but was just reflecting the loss & expressing sorrow at the hurts that actually abbreviated their friendship... he said a lot of good there too on that post and yeah - might've chosen some different words - but hey, HE's the guy who lost a very close friend (once you get that tight it seems your brothers no matter what) HE has to walk in his shoes, nor anyone here... and I think it's not unreasoinable to think maybe Larry would be defending his old friend from the criticism right now. 

Out of respect for the Norman family I'd suggest maybe we back away from this topic on the memorial page - Randy's response was no doubt rushed and under duress due to hundreds of folks asking him about it while he's greiving... of course there were issues, but clearly it seems like they were both trying to get past that and it's personal anyway and is really no one elses business but Larry & Randys...  GOD BLESS THEM BOTH!!!


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Pastor Mike from Calif.

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Although Larry's memorial service was well attended, it would seem that an even larger number of folks who supported Larry's ministry were unable to attend.  I see no value in trying to make an issue of this.   



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Robb

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Thanks, Terry, for bringing to our attention the statement that Randy posted at his site.  If you hadn't mentioned it, I would not have searched for his site and read his reflections on his relationship with Larry.  I think Randy penned his thoughts well and eloquently expressed some highs and lows and some gratitude and regrets about the trails they blazed and followed together.  So, I say thanks to Randy for his thoughts and thanks also for tributes to Larry on these boards by musicians such as Phil, Paul, and Ulf.   



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Anonymous

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Hi there.  I appreciate the comments.  You're right.  Doesn't belong on the memorial site.  My apologies to friends, fans and family.  And especially to Randy Stonehill who's work I have deeply loved. 

I especially appreciate those who experessed tolerance for my thoughts and feelings as well as gentle exhortation. 

Others who were not so polite..that's okay too.  Sure they meant well.

Again, my apologies. 

Terry

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tom

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Terry,

I wouldn't worry so much about your original take on Randy's statement. I felt, and still feel, his comments about Larry that "he consistently seemed to 'derail' relationships through out his life" and that "his struggles with his own demons is over," were inappropriate. Though Randy did have many good things to say, it seemed to me that he could have just left out these or maybe said them in a better way. Afer all, we're remembering the life of a very dear brother who can no longer respond. Yet, I know Larry has forgiven him anyway.

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Anonymous

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thanks for the validation on that.   It's just so hard.  All kinds of feelings must come up for those who have loved him so much over the years. 

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Anonymous

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God bless Larry. God bless Randy.

Larry loved honesty. Larry loved Randy. Randy loved Larry.

"The only name to spread is Jesus' name."

God bless you all.

Kurt Timeless.

www.myspace.com/kurttimeless

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Anonymous

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terry, I tend to think, for the most part you're right.  Maybe Randy is feeling guilty about his attitude towards Larry. But Larry thru the love of Christ forgave.  Randy is still too busy trying to be a rock star.  Larry didnt want it but Randy did.  Well my view anyway. 

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greg

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.....still, there was something wanting after reading it.......

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Terry Roland

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thanks. Yes.  I think it was a premature statement when emotions are pretty raw.  In the end, its all about mercy and forgiveness.  The love of Jesus shines through all circumstances of life. 

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Anonymous

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The author of the 4th entry in this thread wrote:

"Out of respect for the Norman family I'd suggest maybe we back away from this topic on the memorial page"
 
That is worth repeating.

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Anonymous

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This would be in response to the "Ol Terry"  "Maybe you had a bad day"  "Get over it" comments. 

No need to be too personal in your response.  I was responding to a public statement made for all to read.  Also, just my opinion.  Not a judgement; just an opinion.  Probably best withheld at this time or discussed with others in forum. 

It seems on public forums and e-mails some tend to think that the norms of manners toward others are suspended, especially since we are anonymous.  

And actuallly, I had a great day.  Remembering Larry has brought up a lot of good feelings along side the sad ones.  It's also helped to increase my own intimacy with God.  And, in the end, its all about the love we feel, the pain that comes up and the mercy we offer each other as God has freely given to us.  Having lost so many in my life, I always say, "Grief is a constant journey."  

 


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Urs HEINZ

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Anonymous wrote:

This would be in response to the "Ol Terry"  "Maybe you had a bad day"  "Get over it" comments. 

No need to be too personal in your response.  I was responding to a public statement made for all to read.  Also, just my opinion.  Not a judgement; just an opinion.  Probably best withheld at this time or discussed with others in forum. 

It seems on public forums and e-mails some tend to think that the norms of manners toward others are suspended, especially since we are anonymous.  

And actuallly, I had a great day.  Remembering Larry has brought up a lot of good feelings along side the sad ones.  It's also helped to increase my own intimacy with God.  And, in the end, its all about the love we feel, the pain that comes up and the mercy we offer each other as God has freely given to us.  Having lost so many in my life, I always say, "Grief is a constant journey."  

 


Why do you have to be anonyme ? Honesty and upright transparency were always a great gift and concern of Larry.

I remember him well, as he showed me a picture with Pamela and Randy , as they all went to Chamonix in France ( The highest mountain there in Europe is Mont Blanc ) Larry was quite happy and I remember how much he fordhered and did for Randy. May be it would really be better to do, what the 4th quote suggested.



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Anonymous

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Terry Roland wrote:

I read Randy Stonehill's comments on his site yesterday. First, let me say, I feel somewhat angry about the tone of the letter.  I believe it was maybe a personal and private letter of regret about opportunities missed. I also wonder about his comment that he knew Larry better than anyone.  I wonder what Charles would have to say about that...Or his mother?  I also wonder about those who sustained healthy relationships with Larry to the end. When there is conflict, it is rarely one-sided, but the tone of Stonehill's letter sounds like the disconnect came from Larry alone.   

All of that aside, a tribute from Randy Stonehill about Larry would've been more fitting at this time.  Whatever personal feelings he may have held could be put aside for now, or relayed in a more personal manner. 

It was just disappointing.  And then to not show up at the memorial.....

I hope I don't sound judgemental.....it just bothered me..struck me as poor timing and inappropriate. 



          Let us Pray for RANDY and for ONEANOTHER !



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Chuck Strantz

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 I couldn't help but be reminded of Larry's song "what's wrong with this Body"
 still insightfull of how we interact with each other, as we stumble through this
 Life. We (I) need the life changing power of God's Holy Spirit daily, really  momemt by moment.  Humbly as we ask,  he assists and changes us.
 thanks
 chuck

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Nathan

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It might be of interest to check out Drew Marshall's page.  

www.drewmarshall.ca   At the very time of Larry's funeral (Saturday), Drew was re-airing an interview done with Larry back in April/May 2005.   Featured live guests who were also present during this airing were Phil Keaggy, Geoff Moore, and....Randy Stonehill (apparently, the mystery has been solved of where he was during the funeral)

Evidently, this re-airing will be available to listen to in its entirety on Friday, from the archive section of Drew Marshall's web page.   (Click on 'listen')

Part 2 of the interview will air on Saturday, consult www.drewmarshall.ca for information. 

As a side note, this chance to hear Larry answer questions about his health, spirituality, artistry, and friendships has been amazingly therapeutic for myself and perhaps others who have fallen out of touch with our beloved brother, and are still grieving. 

As for Randy, his wonderful friendship with Larry was no doubt very complex, and I'm sure he had an opportunity to discuss his partnership with a bit more clarity during the show.

  



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Terry Roland

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RE: Randy Stonehill/Drew Marshall
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I'm just finding out who Drew Marshall is and his show.  I'm going to enjoy all of those interviews with so many interesting people. 

Thanks for the heads up on this.  I enjoyed these last two responses to the thread I probably shouldn't have started.  I agree.  As excellent singer-songwriter Mary Gauthier says..."We all need a little mercy now."   

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Rob neiman

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RE: Randy Stonehill Site Comment...
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Larry was an interesting musician/artist/person.  He was human with a lot of injuries that probably added to his abstract behavior.  We all act wierd and indifferent at times.  His ideosynchracies were more apparent because he was in the spotlight.  We all have our feelings of what we thought about Larry and his moody ways.  The key is, we all are a bit off sometimes, but we don't have thousands of people watching our every move, every word or action.  He added a lot to the music industry and I feel he was an asset to the Christian music scene we know today.

Here is my blog that I posted at the Daniel Amos board:
Larry sang about death and dying and heaven quite alot. I suppose we all thought he might live forever. If he was a cat, his 9 lives would have been up long ago. God had the grace to let Larry finish what he started and brought him home when it was time. It still is a shock to think that he's gone. I've seen larry at his best and at his worst. he was a force to be reckoned with. His music will live on and like so many others (Keith green Rich Mullins, Mark Heard & Roby Duke) we will miss the creative juice that flowed freely from his veins and into our hearts. I know some had issues with his ways, but lots happened in music because of stuff he did. Let's look at the positive impact he had on so many lives and strive to reach others with our art (even when we're moody, unrealistic, self serving and down right nasty). Hey, it's all about being human and being ourselves in the "good, the bad and the ugly" stages of life. Larry was an enigma wrapped in an enigma. I guess like most artists, moody, unpredictable, forgetful and silly. It's what made Larry Larry.


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Anonymous

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RE: Randy Stonehill Site Comment.......
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The first Christian albums I owned as a teen were "Only Visiting this Planet"
by Larry Norman, and " " by Randy Stonehill- sorry I can't remember the name, athough I listened to it often.

Regarding comments,
"Better out than in, I always say."

I think it's always good to put forth our heartfelt thoughts and emotions, Christian or otherwise, within reason I guess, but then it's also helpful and should be expected that we receive input from others, within reason I guess also, in order to keep us on track and grounded, as people seem to be doing here. At least for me it is. Dialogue and the communication process.

I think Christians, and others, are at times unreal and can end up being not so heartfelt however. We may feel the pressure to say and do the right things in order to fit in or to appear more holy. We can be so able to regurgitate religious jargon and sentiment, and often very well, as we sometimes have had a great deal of practice at it. Not to sound preachy, hopefully.

Fine if it's real though.

Not meaning to say that's happening here, but something to keep in mind I suppose. The dialogue and comments are a good thing though I think.

*I personally think this thread is fine, and actually saw nothing wrong with it in the first place. Nor with comments in response, nor with comments by R. Stonehill, but that's just my opinion. I think honest heartfelt questioning and emotion, is a good thing. Again this is my take. I guess if we make public statements, or actions, we can expect responses at times and that's a good thing, I think.

I have enjoyed reading, and have learned from all the dialogue here.


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Terry Roland

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RE: Randy Stonehill Site Comment...
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Hi Rob,

You made several good points.  Mostly, what I get from my perspective is we all need to share love and tolerance with each other, even when we are just fans who experience all of this from a distance.  Music is a very personal experience for those of us who love it.  It ties us to our own history and our growth and spiritual experience.  That being said, this does effect us, albeit not nearly as much as those close to Larry.  So, we all differ and have our own knee jerk responses.  In the end, we love and tolerate each other....I believe that was Larry's example we well.

Glad you enjoyed the thread. I espeically like what you said about being real as oppossed to the platitudes that are often used.  Not being a very controversial or conflictual person, I think my inital post was what I described as knee-jerk. 

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john howie (scotland)

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Another great friend of Larry's was Steve Camp , have a look at his memorial on his site. you will have to scroll down to mon 25th feb to find it but it's worth the search.
God bless
john

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john howie(scotland)

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RE:Steve Camp site memorial
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Have a look at what Steve Camp has to say about his brother Larry, It brought a smile to my face .stevenjcamp.blogspot.com

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Anonymous

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RE: Randy Stonehill Site Comment...
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i wanted to see what the respective websites for both daniel amos and randy stonehill had to say about larry's passing.

seems that daniel amos took the 'if you can't say something nice don't say anything at all' approach.

after reading randy's comments maybe he should've done the same thing.

randy, you're no larry norman.




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Krissy Hair

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As someone who loves both Larry and Randy dearly,but who has not met them,I think that Larry would be very saddend by many of the comments made about his brother and friend. Most of us have never known Randy on a personal level.I read his tribute and I say,let's not read in between the lines. Unless you've talked to him privetly,you shouldn't even mention your negitive take on it in public. That is gossip,and I dare anyone to say that God would approve of that! You can't know why he wrote what he did,so you should not discuss it. Period. And any Christian should have some apologies ready if they were in on gossip. Think. Would YOU really want people to do that to you? What if YOU wrote something like that and people you didn't even know were saying all sorts of unkind things about you? Wouldn't you be hurt and wish they would have come to you first? Again,I dare you to say that God is pleased with this.

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Anonymous

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mmmmmm....Chrissy,  I don't see any gossip in this thread.  Only personal responses to a public statement.  I would say most of what I read here are opinions and need to be taken as such.  Had the comment been a private one that was leaked and then distorted, that would be gossip.  This is not.  There's no reading between the lines to state that Randy said some negatives along with the positives.  There's no gossip or reading between the lines in observing Randy had Larry had a long-standing lack of communication for many years. 
And as a matter of opinion, Randy's comments could have been written in private with a more positive tribute to his friend.  These are observations and opinions.  No gossip in this thread at all.

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Ron

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The issues between Randy and Larry were very public at the time, and I am sad that these events found their way into the media.  Based on those serious issues and the fact that they were quite public, I actually thought Randy's comments were honest, fair and well spoken.  I was most happy to find out that they had mended their relationship at least to a certain degree.

May we bring glory to God in all we do...

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cRaShDoG

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I'm glad to see that i'm not the only one surprised and offended by Randy Stonehill's comments on his website. A few days ago I randomly browsed some websites of musicians that I knew were affiliated with Larry, and after reading Randy's remarks I immediately called a friend and recited it to him and he too thought it was a low-blow. I know that Stonehill and Norman had a falling out, and i've even heard some rumors as to the reasons why, but to make a public statement like that after Larry just passed away was uncalled for. It didn't do anything except make Randy look like a self-centered arrogant jerk. I looked for a way to contact Randy on his website because I wanted to confront him about it, but it seems you can only contact his management group. Go figure.  

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Anonymous

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As one who knew them both very, very well, (better than most) the comments were undersandable, but very mistimed. The Bible says, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone".  Somehow I think that's not the case here. Sir Stonehill, the feud is over by default...let it go...grow up, and let Jesus sort all of this out.  We must prefer one another, and honour the Lord in what we say about our brothers and sisters.  There are some who choose to handcuff people to their pasts, never letting people grow in grace and mercy.  The Christian community is famous for that. (It happened betwen Randy and I) I know that Larry, until the very end, loved Randy, and hurt over the continuing venom that flowed, often very stealthy, through song or off the cuff staements on stage or in the press.  Both were guilty, but I sure wouldn't want to think that people used the time of my death (potentialy imminent) to stir up old stuff, and express the bitterness they couldn't let go of.

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Anonymous

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I thought Randy's comments were genuine, not disrespectful of Larry.

I'm sure many of us have had individuals in our lives who we never fully understood (nor, perhaps, fully understood us), and from whom, along with great blessing and fulfillment, we also experienced brokenness. We'd like it if things more neatly fell into place, but they don't, and perhaps we will never know why.

It's evident in what Randy wrote that he still had a longing for additional re-connection with Larry (a positive thing). But such "missing pieces" are part of the experience of life, and Randy writes as if he is aware of that. It is what it is. To me, Randy's comments reflect that reality.

Making an educated guess, had Randy died prior to Larry, I think it's probable Larry's comments would have contained a similar expression of discontent that some might have interpreted as blaming. But hey, these guys were best friends for years, so it shouldn't be suprising. I think it is reasonable to take Randy's comments as being from his prespective, nothing more... and not fault him for that.

Lastly, why is it strange for Randy to state that he knew Larry better than anyone? I am very comfortable putting the best construction on what he said and assume he didn't mean to dis anyone, because I'm sure he didn't.

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Anonymous

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This is getting pretty weird.  We decided a while ago to let this thread drop out of respect for the Norman family.  At this point they don't need to be reading this stuff.  This is a memorial to Larry and the thread was not the right place to discuss this issue, if at all.  Let's stop it now.  Let me have the last word.  Please don't respond to this post so that it will drop down and be replaced by words of love and praise for Larry.

Thanks

 

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Nurse

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Terry the other issue is that unless we are sick to extend I understand Larry Norman was, he would have found it very difficult to maintain anything , let alone strained friendships. As a person with a medical background and my understanding of Larry's illness, he would have had cognitive difficulties, extreme lethargy and fatigue, shortness of breath and limited mobility.

I think it may be a case of lack of empathy on Mr Stonehill's behalf for a very sick man....unless we are experiencing such a long term, debilitating illness ourselves we find it difficult to understand, this is where, perhaps, Stonehill was coming from...he may need to watch the movie 'The Doctor'.

Bless ya

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Terry Roland

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Yes.  Thanks, Nurse for that insight.  Of course...I know there were problems with Daniel Amos and Horrendous Disc as well.  I don't know the time line on that...but, some with a traumatic head injury would certainly find stress a major factor in relationships.  I don't know that Randy considered this. 

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cRaShDoG

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Despite Larry and Randy's problems over the years I think Randy made a mistake by being so foreward in his public comments as well as not attending Larry's funeral. Sure, I don't know everything that went on between them, but he should have let bygons be bygons. It's obvious that Randy is still carrying around a lot of bitterness and pain and hasn't totally forgiven Larry. It's a shame because some day he'll probably regret all of this....and it will be too late to change the past. In the meantime, let's all just keep Randy in prayer. He's a brother in the Lord who needs our support and encouragement, not judgment.



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Anonymous

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I think Randy's comment was appropriate.  He obviously retains great affection for LN's influence on his life. 

Their relationship was complex both on an artistic and personal level.  Yes, they fell out over artistic issues which we don't completely understand, and it should be remembered that Larry married Randy's ex, which must have been complicated.

Still, it was LN who introduced him to the Christian faith and they did sort of reconcile all these epic differences in later years...

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Anonymous

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It bares repeating that it's very probable that the problem mostly stemmed from Larry's head injury.  One of the outcomes of this type of injury is to be emotionally volatile, especially under stress.  It's very hard to understand when you're close to the person.  This may have been what happened between Randy and Larry.....No easy answer and certainly something that is being healed even now. 

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